forgiveness

๐Ÿ‘ฉ๐Ÿฝ HEALING THE PARENT WOUND ๐Ÿ‘จ๐Ÿฝ

healing the parent wound.jpg

This is can hold the key to your freedom, being yourself authentically. Family is not an area people want to work on until they realise it effects all areas of their life from relationships to business.

.

Most of our fears and insecurities come from our perception of our interaction with our parents. Everyone had something in their childhood. Even the person who had the most beautiful childhood has pain somewhere whether they share it or not.
.
Maybe your parents never saw you and understood you. Maybe they physically abused you leaving you feeling worthless. Or maybe they put too much pressure on you that you felt you had to be perfect to receive their love.
.
Your mum and dad will never be who you want them to be. There will always be something you wish they did or didnโ€™t do. The truth is you canโ€™t change the past but you can see the lessons and forgive them.
.
So how do you forgive?
.
You see that forgiveness is for your freedom, not for them. When you forgive, youโ€™re not making them right. Youโ€™re choosing to let go of the weight, resentment and move on. Youโ€™re choosing your future over your past.
.
There is such a truthful quote I found the other day by Anne Lamott, โ€œExpectations are resentments under constructions.โ€
.
When you expect your mum or dad to do something, you lost sight of who they truly are. You might say, โ€œYeah but theyโ€™re meant to be my parents!โ€. They are, but theyโ€™re humans on their journey as well and no one is perfect.
.
Letting go of the story requires you stepping into your authority and leadership which can feel scary. Because who would you be without your story? Itโ€™s what the little girl/boy in you have known all those years.
.
This is a process of growing up and parenting yourself, coming closer to yourself every step along the way.
.
Your parents are your mirrors. They show you parts you donโ€™t love and accept about yourself. The more you love them, the more you love yourself โœจ
.
If youโ€™d like support in forgiving, loving your parents, and healing childhood traumas, I offer coaching sessions around this. I deeply care about you all and I want you to move forward with ease, freedom and love this year ๐Ÿ˜
.
If youโ€™re interested, message me โค๏ธ
.
I love you ๐ŸŒน
.
.
.
(Image is me with my mum and dad, love them so much ๐Ÿ˜)
.

๐Ÿƒ๐Ÿ‚ LETTING GO ๐Ÿ‚๐Ÿƒ

letting go.jpg

The more you let go, the more you'll become who you truly are.. 

.

There's this story of a lion being brought up amongst sheeps. So it feels and acts like a sheep. Then one day, he gets captured by another lion. Taken to a pond, he sees his own reflection. He realises he's a lion. 

.

What people expect from you becomes who you should be. Other people's opinions of you becomes what you believe about yourself. You might have taken them on without questioning, so what you believe about yourself might not even belong to you.. 

.

Living up to that expectation takes a lot of energy. It makes you feel tired and exhausted. You might want to be in your own space. Because you haven't been yourself, then you feel like you can only be yourself when you're on your own so you're better off on your own.

.

These are all conditionings, habits, how you believe you should be in the world to get love, to be enough, to fit in, to have control and power.. So many masks you carry around which are not really you. 

.

So how do you change that?

.

Know what you want, find out what your true nature is. Then if there are experiences and people from the past you're holding onto that stops you from being that, let them go. 

.

And how do you exactly let go? 

.

You stop holding on. You know that its done its job and you don't need it anymore. See what it taught you, thank it and say goodbye. Know that the void you just created will be filled with something as good or even better ๐Ÿ˜‰

.

As you shed all these skin, you might feel like you're not where you used to be, but you're not where you want to be either. So that can feel like this weird in between stage where things are moving and not very stabilising. That's ok, acknowledge how far you came and keep your focus on where you want to go.

.

Look at nature, especially the transition period we are in right now. Trees don't hold onto their leaves as they die, they let them go knowing that in few months they'll have new leaves.. They're in total surrender in what is naturally happening.

.

People might not understand or judge the change that is happening in you, because you're showing them parts they're not happy within themselves either but not brave to go in there to face and shift it.. Let them be. By following your truth you're doing them a massive favour in the long run showing them they can do the same. Their worry is not your problem anyway ๐Ÿ˜ƒ

.

When you're struggling to let go, ask yourself:

- What am I scared of loosing?

- Which part of me feels unsafe?

- When I don't let go, what's the payoff? (Everything you do has a payoff. It might be you get to be taken care of, you get love, you avoid being in your power by not letting go or you get to be in control by holding on etc)

.

As you let go more and more, change becomes easier, you let go easier. As the old story leaves you, your life leads to a new beginning โœจ

.

There's an incredible guided meditation about letting go, moving on that I love. It's great for grief and seperation. If you'd like to try it out, let me know your email and I'll send it to you ๐Ÿ™Œ๐Ÿผ

.

Loads of love to you! โœจ

.

.

๐ŸŽˆ FORGIVENESS ๐ŸŽˆ

I've been doing experiential healing lately. And I'm grateful for having received loads of those from my boyfriend. Relationships bring up a lot of stuff so what we do is as they come up we clear them there and then so they stop coming up โœŒ๐Ÿผ

.

I do them in my sessions as well when they're needed. They're basically a super fast way to move forward. Let's say you believe 'I can't have what I want, if I have, it will be taken away from me.' We feel into it and go back to a moment where you felt it strongly, sometime in the childhood. You talk to the person as if they were there, they talk back, you understand where they're coming from, you forgive and love them. That thing stops showing up. It can show up as a thought form but has no emotional charge around. Works with traumatic experiences, clears it all. Pretty magic.. You can do it on your own too. But I've been lazy, I ask Aaron to do it ๐Ÿ˜ƒ
.
One powerful thing I keep seeing again and again is that forgiveness is so important to release any energy around something, a person or a situation.
.
So allowing yourself to feel, then forgiving. Forgiving the person for what they did or didn't.. Seeing and understanding their pain, seeing the reason behind why they showed up in the way they did.
.
We're all born as pure love. Something has to have happened to someone for them to show up with no love.
.
I had one the other day where I saw that one of my ex just didn't own anything he created, kept blaming others. Through this healing process, I saw that he just didn't know any other way, that was the best he could do at that time. Knowing that you can't really carry on resenting and being angry at someone. You just have compassion and understanding for them.
.
Forgiveness doesn't mean you agree with what they're doing, it just means you don't want to carry on holding a hot coal, you let it go..
.
It's forgiving yourself as much as forgiving others. For making a mistake, for not speaking up, for being mean to yourself, forgiving all those times.. It's total freedom..
.
Message me if you have a pattern coming up that you want to clear. Much love to you! ๐Ÿ’›
.
.
___________________________________
UPCOMING WORKSHOPS:
Goddess Circles:
โœจ Monday 10 July *6:30-9pm*
โœจ Monday 24 July *6:30-9pm*
๐Ÿƒ TO BOOK --> www.isiktlabar.com