ecstatic dancing

💃🏽 CONFIDENCE: BEING YOURSELF💃🏽

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Video: https://www.facebook.com/isik.tlabar/posts/10160864658090300?__tn__=K-R

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Confidence is owning all that you are and showing up in the world saying “This is who I am.” ❤️

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One of the most common things I come across people say in sessions and workshops is in some form or another, “I want to be myself. Sometimes, I don’t know who I am.”

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Confidence starts with being yourself. I don’t believe you can fake until you make it. People can tell that you’re faking it, they’re not stupid. And you definitely know that you’re faking it 😃 so what’s the point of that when you can start from where you’re at? Sometimes being yourself is being in silence. You don’t have to express your opinion about everything all the time. Or you don’t have to be loud to be or feel confident. No confident person ever tried to prove they’re confident anyway.

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When you see someone being themselves, it gives you the permission to do the same in your own way. You might have heard this quote by Marianne Williamson, 

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“Our deepest fear is not that we are inadequate. Our deepest fear is that we are powerful beyond measure. It is our light, not our darkness that most frightens us. We ask ourselves, Who am I to be brilliant, gorgeous, talented, fabulous? Actually, who are you not to be? You are a child of God. Your playing small does not serve the world. There is nothing enlightened about shrinking so that other people won't feel insecure around you. We are all meant to shine, as children do. We were born to make manifest the glory of God that is within us. It's not just in some of us; it's in everyone. And as we let our own light shine, we unconsciously give other people permission to do the same. As we are liberated from our own fear, our presence automatically liberates others.”

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It’s probably my favourite quote to date ❤️

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As children we felt free, we lived in the moment. We didn’t worry about how we looked or what people thought about us. We were so busy being ourselves, having fun and enjoying the world. What if we kept that outlook on life? What if we didn’t doubted or questioned ourselves?

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I saw ‘I Feel Pretty’ last week. I loved it so much that I watched it again. It’s about how we pressure ourselves to look a certain way, especially women, how we criticise ourselves constantly beating ourselves up. When we look at someone we can see what makes them, them, in their unique way but when it comes down to ourselves, we’re our worst critics.

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✨ Who would you be if no one you knew existed?✨

Who you are is you, better than all the comparisons and shoulds because no one is you. No one has your face, your ideas, your energy, your creativity. Even if its a similar idea that is done before, it’s not you who’s doing it, your energy matters. 

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✨ What would you do if rejection didn’t exist? ✨

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Rejection is another thing. When it happens, we make it personal about us. Even if we knew deep down, that person wasn’t right for us, now on top of that you feel rejected, unwanted and unloved. The truth is it doesn’t mean anything about you, and it’s time to find someone who will cherish you for who you are.

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Another thing is you don’t have to believe in yourself all the time. I definitely don’t. All you need is 1-2 cheerleaders by your side as a reminder of what you already know, deep down. They can be your friend, lover, your coach, someone that will tell you, “I believe in you. You’re a shining star and you got this.” And some days its you, telling yourself.

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Here’s a process for you:

- Stand infront of a mirror and look into your eyes

- Keep breathing

- Think of something you like about yourself and say it to yourself out loud

- It can be small or big, physical or anything else. To take it to the next level, do this once a day every day for a week and see what you come up with 🤩 you might even hug yourself by the end of it 🌹

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If you want to feel what it feels like to be yourself, with no judgement or shame, come do breathwork with me on the 20th next week. If you know what that feels like, come join anyway. Let’s go deeper, find parts of you that you didn’t know was there. And all you’re doing is breathing ✨

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Make sure to book your ticket if you want to join, we’re half full now. Here’s the link to book:

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https://www.brownpapertickets.com/event/3600217

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You might get caught up in your imperfections and completely miss what makes you amazing until someone points it out.

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So tag a friend and comment below. What do you love about them? What makes them, them? Let’s celebrate each other 😍❤️

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Loads of love to you 😘

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🎧 by Monolink - The End

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🌀 DANCE YOUR WAY OUT OF SHAME 🌀

I’ve been quiet for nearly two weeks now. A lot has been going on, I was in a place where I didn’t know where to start sharing from, so I didn’t share at all 😂 I’m going to break it down for you all, about what has been coming up for me lately. Here’s the first one 💛

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I was always ashamed of the way I moved and danced. As soon as I moved a bit sensual, shame would creep in. I would judge myself, worried how others are judging me too. When I first went to ecstatic dancing 3 years ago, I judged everyone there, I thought, ‘Omg where have I come to? These crazy people.’ without knowing that’d be the place I release tons of bagage each time, the place I meet one of my closest friend today and the place I hear my body’s wisdom for the first time.
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After few times of going dancing, judgement towards myself and others went away. I started to get out of my head, come back into my body and allow it to do it’s own thing. I cried, cried and cried so many times. Now I go to 5rhythms every week which is movement meditation practice at the same venue, a beautiful magical church in Vauxhall. I dance most days in the mornings, in-between sessions, cooking or at night.
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The other night, I was writing but the words were coming out from my head, there was no emotion in them. I decided to put on some psytrance, shake my body a bit, breathe, open my jaw, move a little, connect and film myself.
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When I filmed this, I had no intention to post it anywhere. It was for me to see myself in my frustration and have compassion for myself. I watched the whole thing cringing, not wanting to watch it. I thought, I look weird. I felt embarrasment and shame, I allowed myself to feel it. Then I asked myself, ‘Who says dancing needs to look a specific way?’ It’s your dance and you decide how you want to move and you don’t have to explain why. And it’s ok to have these thoughts and feelings even when you’ve been dancing for a while now.
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The same night after moving, I sat down and wrote 1,200 words in one go.
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You can dance your dreams into your life and dance trauma out of your life. Your body has its own wisdom and if only you can listen to it and trust it just a little bit more, it has so much to say ❤️
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To see yourself deeper and to be seen, follow these steps:
- Film yourself dancing, moving (if dancing is not your thing, it could be talking to the camera). Let your body move in any way it wants to move, there are no mistakes in moving
- Watch it yourself or even better, show it to a close friend of yours and watch it together
- See the beauty in you as you watch it. If you’re watching with a friend, you don’t need to hear their feedback, just allow yourself to be seen by them.
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May you dance your dreams into your life 🙏🏼💙
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Go to https://www.facebook.com/isik.tlabar/videos/10160161439905300/ to watch the video.

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Feel free to share this, loads of love to you 💛
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